'Foolish' by Sudar

I was told to listen closely to the words of this song today...  Sitting alone and thinking of you While you are sitting alone and thinking of me How could I be so foolish to think That you are sitting alone and thinking of me While I am sitting alone and thinking of you How could I be so foolish to think That you could be mine... Would you be mine?

I've always thought this is such a beautiful song. Now it's even more beautiful

The Problem of Time and Space (part 13 of many)

The Problem Of Time & Space (part 12 of many)

An exit to an extended brief hiatus

I'm reminded of how I heard a lone trumpet while I was sleeping in the forest in Yoyogi Park...

Along with it, I sang an almost silent murmur...

'Summertime, and the living is easy...'

I can't wait to have that again. Unfortunately, I will be surrounded by snow then.

A Brief Note On A Brief Hiatus (part 3 of many)

The title above have inevitably transformed itself into a lie. My hiatus is no longer brief. It has been around for way too long.

Unfortunately I still have not gotten around to sorting out my shit yet. In fact, it has occurred to me that a brand new pile of shit have just been unloaded on my feet. Funnily (not in a hilarious manner, unless if you like sick humour), this pile of shit have been poured upon myself by myself. In my realizing of how I've been cradling this bag of excrement (and not to mention, progressively adding to it) for too long, I suddenly lost the strength in my upper torso. My fingers slipped and I let go.

I should stop now, lest I run the risk of the title being a complete lie. Lying always make me feel like crap.

a brief note on a brief hiatus (part 2 of many)

photo by Dill Malik

a brief note on a brief hiatus

It might appear to you that I have stopped caring. You might find yourself telling you that.
For now, you ought to suspend all belief in yourself in regards to that matter.

I just need to sort my shit out.

brb

The Problem Of Time & Space (part 11 of many)

The Problem Of Time & Space (part 10 of many)

I want to be your Godot

I can clearly recall, the act of my stomach breaking down was the precursor to an organ, much more critical than my stomach doing the same.

so wonderful to know you

The Problem Of Time & Space (part 9 of many)

And the other half of my face was peeking at my ipod, waiting for a response

Nice to see, nice to hold
Once heartbroken, considered sold

Just When I Thought I Knew You

My niece is damn avant garde

The Problem Of Time & Space (part 8 of many)

People Don't Always Know Best (part 1 of many)

People should stop pretending to be photographers.

The costumes are too expensive.

The Problem Of Time & Space (part 7 of many)

It is so hard to write about bears

my brain hurts.

but in a good way

My Desire Is To Use The Word 'Chichi' In Daily Conversation

Why is chi too so chichi of late?

So, it is really happening...

'Longing' by chi too
13 works of various mediums
August 4 to 14, Black Box, MAPKL
supported by VWFA and MAPKL

The Problem Of Time & Space (part 6 of many)

#6a


#6b


#6c

My Desire Is To Use The Word 'Ubiquitous' In Daily Conversation (UPDATED!)

You'll find yourself quite ubiquitous if you are to take a walk in my mind

The Problem Of... Sigh...

No, I did not fall into the sea

no... i'm neither sipping beer nor eating pork

zero energy
sipping beer and eating pork
what would jesus do?

ps: working on a saturday night is a lie

pps: time to lust over re-nest.com

Haiku Roll

Going to the beach
Writing that film about us
Air conditioner

I want to indulge in drunkenness and tomfoolery with you.

Here's a list in the form of a haiku:
1) blowing kazoos
2) eating melon ice cream
3) rolling on grass

The Problem Of Time & Space (part 5 of many)

The Problem Of Time & Space (part 4 of many)

#4a


#4b

My mother told me today that she would like to go to church again. Apparently she told herself that she would start going to church again after my father passes away.

I'm thinking if I should do the same also.

The Problem Of Time & Space (part 3 of many)

Please Don't Laugh At My Tragedy

Type-C photographic print
12"x16"
edition of 5

Longing #12

I've posted this picture here many times already.

The next time I post this, it won't be here.
I wish you can see it then.

I am tired of 2 things

1) not ever getting to live my life like a normal person

2) constantly having to make tough choices

I am tired

this sentence is a mere one percent of a picture

By that logic, a word is only a thousandth of a picture...

(I need to write more)

They say a picture paints a thousand words

I have ran out of pictures


(I need a bigger SD card)

One day we will live behind these walls

Longing for some quiet

The Problem Of Time & Space (part 2 of many)

I want to swim in the ocean with giant whales with you

The Problem Of Time & Space (part 1 of many)

There is a hole in the ground

The sky is in that hole

sharing latitudes for a fleeting moment.

kenapa kita masih berjauhan?

I am ready to do 2 things now

1) go to sleep

2) write and make a fictional short film with a proper narrative

This clairvoyant thing is starting again...

not good.

Within the intermittent sleep I had last night...

Waking

Sleeping

Waking

Sleeping

I dreamt that you came back

Waking

For The Lonely #20

I have a pencil sharpener shaped like a shrimp. It is made in Shanghai, China. It's orange in colour and is bent in a crescent shape. I guess it is modeled after a cooked shrimp. A live one would have been straight, and perhaps white in colour. To use it I insert a pencil into its head and twist. The shavings would expel itself from the side of its head. With a pencil on it, it looks like a fancy hor d'oeuvre.

"Madame, voulez-vous une crevette sur un bâton?"

"quoi?"

"une crevette sur un bâton"

"Je passe"

"le bâton?"

Does it anti-matter?

A litte bit of me dies

It decays inside of me

Euwww... that's damn gross!

Please Keep Clean #4

For The Lonely #19

For The Lonely #18

godspeed

I like caves...

Dark, damp, empty caverns...

Immense space reverberating infinitely

HAH!

hah



hah





hah












hah





















hah...



It's time for me to retreat into my cave

Every Now And Then I Feel The Need/Desire/Capacity To Engage In A Textual Discourse Of My Current State Of Affairs (part many of many)

Today I feel that I possess the capacity to do so.

For the past week, I'm overwhelmed with a desire to sleep. To engage in a state of unconsciousness so furiously that it engulfs me entirely in my conscious state. I awake to find myself tired. I'm asleep to find myself riddled with dreams that are profound, and yet at the same time, makes no sense whatsoever.

I awake to senseless questions that catches me unaware. I find myself obsessed with answering these questions, but find my answers coming too late. Forever buried in irrelevance. Smothered by obsoleteness.

Having realize this makes me even more tired.

I have a film to shoot and edit, an art festival to organize, possibly an art show, a sculpture to build, an academic presentation, and a performance to execute.

I think I'll go to sleep now.

For The Lonely #17

For The Lonely #16

For The Lonely #15

For The Lonely #14

I imagine that in the last moments of my life, when my life is flashing before my eyes, jimnopedis no. 2 will be the soundtrack

-what?

you know, jimnopedis... Erik Satie



-you mean Gymnopédie No.2





oui

NGOs AND ACADEMICS WILL BE THE DEATH OF ME!

SHOUTING PROFANITIES INTO A PILLOW AS I DROWN MYSELF WITH MY BLANKET. SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW SOMEONE STAB ME RIGHT NOW

For The Lonely #13

Rintihan Lewat Malam

Alas...
I wish there was more green
And some blues and reds

But that would only result in whiteness

A whiteness that envelopes

An envelope containing a letter

A letter that I am about to send you

Which you may receive

Which you may reply

Which I will wait for

Which may never arrive

Which I may continue to wait for

Which I may read

Which may envelope me in a whiteness

A whiteness dotted with reds, greens, and blues

And the ever present greyness of our dreams.


Goodnight.

For The Lonely #12

A hole in my universe

For The Lonely #11

For The Lonely #10

Usually, after bidding goodbye, I'd turn around walk away and never ever look back,

However that night as I walked up the stairs, I secretly hoped to see you one last time, waiting for the train in the plarform across mine.

Alas, a train sits on the tracks.

it's been a month...

now it's a new year.


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