One part of me feels that I am ready to go home. To face the realities of existence of living... to work, to deal with family and friends, and all the nitty gritty details of existence. To a certain extent I am looking forward to being home.
The other part however longs to stay here in Luang Phabang for as long as I can. As the week started I am begining to realize that this would be my last week here. The pangs of leaving slapped me in the face. I sip my coffee and wonder where the past 3 weeks have gone to, since every single day of those 3 weeks felt like they never moved at at all. In the slowness of time, it deceived me and zipped by without me noticing it. Further proof that time never runs in a continuum, but rather as collective moments moving in parallel simultaneously.
To make things worse, the two parts of me connected to each other and are running in opposite directions... with this going on, I fear 2 things might happen:
1) These force of these 2 parts running in 2 different directions might be so strong that they break free from each other. Each then running into oblivion in opposite ways.
2) The bond that holds these 2 parts are so strong that when they run so far apart, it becomes taut and could strech no more... the potential energy would ricochet these 2 parts and they'll crash into each other.
I don't know which is worse. 4 more days in Luang Phabang.
Wednesday, April 11, 2007
Sunday, April 08, 2007
Thoughts On Time Travel (part 01)
Time travel will never be realized. I believe if time travel is ever realized in the future, the people then would not be able to resist the temptation of fixing things in the past. There would be a grand send off party for the team destined to fix up the past so things would be better for the present. Then they'll be documented in the past and those of us in the present would have known how great these time travellers were through our history books.
No, that did not happen. The fluidity of time dictates that even before one can change the present by going back to fix the past, the present would have changed dramatically even before the intended time travelled was permitted. It makes no sense. I reckon a common perception would be that time is this linear continuum that had no beginning and will have no end.
My mind of pure genius tells me otherwise, time is non linear, and all the moments all run in an almost paralel non linear fashion. If time really was linear, that it streches from way back and way ahead without an end, the metaphysical space that's available would never be able to accomodate all that exists. No, time is not linear, its just that our experience of the arrangement of time is linear.
No, that did not happen. The fluidity of time dictates that even before one can change the present by going back to fix the past, the present would have changed dramatically even before the intended time travelled was permitted. It makes no sense. I reckon a common perception would be that time is this linear continuum that had no beginning and will have no end.
My mind of pure genius tells me otherwise, time is non linear, and all the moments all run in an almost paralel non linear fashion. If time really was linear, that it streches from way back and way ahead without an end, the metaphysical space that's available would never be able to accomodate all that exists. No, time is not linear, its just that our experience of the arrangement of time is linear.
Thursday, April 05, 2007
Enlightenment...
Jai Guru Deva Om... whatever that means. Though I have to admit that it sounds super cool in a beatles song and I sometimes chant it to give myself some sense of peace.
Finally I have achieved enlightenment, through constant meditation (though not the usual kind) over the past fortnight or so.
The pace here in Luang Phabang is very slow. So much so that I walk slower, I breathe deeper, my heart pulses less, I think slower... pretty much everything I do feels like a Akira Kurosawa film. It takes its time to move, never in a need to rush anywhere.
How so? A typical day here involves me waking up, having a baguette sandwich and coffee in the local coffee shop whilst reading my book; taking a slow walk around town; stopping by the royal palace grounds (which is now a museum) sitting under a tree reading, writing, or thinking... usually I lull around there just gazing into forever; having a fruitshake by the mekong river zoning out as I watch boats pass by slowly; going to the internet cafe; walking around; more thinking, writing, reading; sleeping once in a while; heading to a nice cafe for tea or coffee; sleeping; doing stuff; more walking around, sometimes I go to the library and help out, sometimes I watch a movie at a cafe... Yes, I have to say it is a very hectic lifestyle here.
Such a, if one may call it, 'passive' lifestyle would, no doubt cause one's brain to slow down tremendously. This can be demonstrated in two recent events:
1) When stopped by a stranger asking me for the time, I looked at my watch, scratched my head and it must have took me more than ten seconds to figure out the time... it was 10 minutes to 8.
2) On a night when Luang Phabang was bathed in darkness due to a power failure, I told myself 'Oh, since there is nothing to do, maybe I should get on the internet then.' It took me quite some time for a lightbulb to smash me in the head that the 'internet' requires electricity.
In retrospect, this may cause one to think that my brains have been fried to a crisp. But in reality, this slowness in my thoughts has been a blessing. By thinking much more slowly, I realize that, my thoughts brew, like a pot of soup cooked slowly over a slow fire, and the end result is usually a concoction of ethereal epiphanies on the realities of myself and the world around me, and the way I interact with it. This slowness in a sense, have caused my thinking process to be almost meditative; so much so that I'm beginning to believe that I've reached the highest level of awareness in Buddhist teachings where one is in a state of 'neither perception nor non-perception.' (I may be delusional). Once again in a fight between thingamajigga and whatcamacallit, thingamajigga wins.
Today, I am at complete ease with myself, and for some strange reason for the first time, I feel like I am ready to go home and deal with all the realities that await me. It is strange, but this readiness to go home is usually foreign, almost alien when I travel. This time however, I realize that I am neither a tourist nor traveller, for I am neither touring nor travelling. I lack a route, I lack adventure, I lack all the essential elements that makes one to be travelling. However, this time around, I am a pilgrim. And on this pilgrimage, I believe I have achieved what I've set to achieve.
Finally I have achieved enlightenment, through constant meditation (though not the usual kind) over the past fortnight or so.
The pace here in Luang Phabang is very slow. So much so that I walk slower, I breathe deeper, my heart pulses less, I think slower... pretty much everything I do feels like a Akira Kurosawa film. It takes its time to move, never in a need to rush anywhere.
How so? A typical day here involves me waking up, having a baguette sandwich and coffee in the local coffee shop whilst reading my book; taking a slow walk around town; stopping by the royal palace grounds (which is now a museum) sitting under a tree reading, writing, or thinking... usually I lull around there just gazing into forever; having a fruitshake by the mekong river zoning out as I watch boats pass by slowly; going to the internet cafe; walking around; more thinking, writing, reading; sleeping once in a while; heading to a nice cafe for tea or coffee; sleeping; doing stuff; more walking around, sometimes I go to the library and help out, sometimes I watch a movie at a cafe... Yes, I have to say it is a very hectic lifestyle here.
Such a, if one may call it, 'passive' lifestyle would, no doubt cause one's brain to slow down tremendously. This can be demonstrated in two recent events:
1) When stopped by a stranger asking me for the time, I looked at my watch, scratched my head and it must have took me more than ten seconds to figure out the time... it was 10 minutes to 8.
2) On a night when Luang Phabang was bathed in darkness due to a power failure, I told myself 'Oh, since there is nothing to do, maybe I should get on the internet then.' It took me quite some time for a lightbulb to smash me in the head that the 'internet' requires electricity.
In retrospect, this may cause one to think that my brains have been fried to a crisp. But in reality, this slowness in my thoughts has been a blessing. By thinking much more slowly, I realize that, my thoughts brew, like a pot of soup cooked slowly over a slow fire, and the end result is usually a concoction of ethereal epiphanies on the realities of myself and the world around me, and the way I interact with it. This slowness in a sense, have caused my thinking process to be almost meditative; so much so that I'm beginning to believe that I've reached the highest level of awareness in Buddhist teachings where one is in a state of 'neither perception nor non-perception.' (I may be delusional). Once again in a fight between thingamajigga and whatcamacallit, thingamajigga wins.
Today, I am at complete ease with myself, and for some strange reason for the first time, I feel like I am ready to go home and deal with all the realities that await me. It is strange, but this readiness to go home is usually foreign, almost alien when I travel. This time however, I realize that I am neither a tourist nor traveller, for I am neither touring nor travelling. I lack a route, I lack adventure, I lack all the essential elements that makes one to be travelling. However, this time around, I am a pilgrim. And on this pilgrimage, I believe I have achieved what I've set to achieve.
Friday, March 30, 2007
Things I Want
Here are a list of things that I want:
1)Kafka On The Shore, by Haruki Murakami
2)Kafka On The Shore, by Haruki Murakami
3)Kafka On The Shore, by Haruki Murakami
4)Kafka On The Shore, by Haruki Murakami
5)Kafka On The Shore, by Haruki Murakami
6)Kafka On The Shore, by Haruki Murakami
7)Kafka On The Shore, by Haruki Murakami
8)Kafka On The Shore, by Haruki Murakami
9)Kafka On The Shore, by Haruki Murakami
10)Kafka On The Shore, by Haruki Murakami
That's all, can I please have it now?
1)Kafka On The Shore, by Haruki Murakami
2)Kafka On The Shore, by Haruki Murakami
3)Kafka On The Shore, by Haruki Murakami
4)Kafka On The Shore, by Haruki Murakami
5)Kafka On The Shore, by Haruki Murakami
6)Kafka On The Shore, by Haruki Murakami
7)Kafka On The Shore, by Haruki Murakami
8)Kafka On The Shore, by Haruki Murakami
9)Kafka On The Shore, by Haruki Murakami
10)Kafka On The Shore, by Haruki Murakami
That's all, can I please have it now?
Sunday, March 25, 2007
Kafka Dreams
I was awoken by my mobile phone's alarm clock at exactly 3 am today when it rang bloody murder. The reason for this ludicrous behaviour was for, ironically, I needed to film an even bigger alarm clock - the venerated great drum of the Wat xieng Moane temple, one of the 32 drums (every temple has its own drum) that reveberates simultaneously in this little 1 kilometer peninular - that strikes every seven days during the full moon, half moon, and dark moon at 4 am in the morning.
The filming was, for want of a better word, awe inspiring. However, it is 4 am in the morning and despite the sound of the great drum still resonating in the space between my ears, I still need my sleep. I said goodbye to my anthropologist friend, whom we shall call Associate Professor Fifi (due to her French connection, and the fact that she really is an associate professor (something i found out today) who is helping me out in this film. From hereon referred to as Fifi) and returned to my room to sleep.
Then the said incident which inspired the title of this entry happened. I had a Kafka dream.
The details was such that I was in Yangon, Burma for the very first time in my life (note this is a very important element, that I am in Burma for the very first time). It was the end of my time in Yangon and the time has come for me to leave. Unfortunately I am an hour short of my flight to Kathmandu, Nepal and I am still not at the airport. So I rushed my way there in hope of boarding this plane though I know very well that I will not be able to board this flight. Suddenly, on the way to the airport, I passed by an awfully familiar grocery store, and the storekeeper said 'Hi'. I went off my vehicle and returned my greetings and realized that I've been to this stall a million times. I Then realized that this is not my first time in Burma.
I woke up.
The filming was, for want of a better word, awe inspiring. However, it is 4 am in the morning and despite the sound of the great drum still resonating in the space between my ears, I still need my sleep. I said goodbye to my anthropologist friend, whom we shall call Associate Professor Fifi (due to her French connection, and the fact that she really is an associate professor (something i found out today) who is helping me out in this film. From hereon referred to as Fifi) and returned to my room to sleep.
Then the said incident which inspired the title of this entry happened. I had a Kafka dream.
The details was such that I was in Yangon, Burma for the very first time in my life (note this is a very important element, that I am in Burma for the very first time). It was the end of my time in Yangon and the time has come for me to leave. Unfortunately I am an hour short of my flight to Kathmandu, Nepal and I am still not at the airport. So I rushed my way there in hope of boarding this plane though I know very well that I will not be able to board this flight. Suddenly, on the way to the airport, I passed by an awfully familiar grocery store, and the storekeeper said 'Hi'. I went off my vehicle and returned my greetings and realized that I've been to this stall a million times. I Then realized that this is not my first time in Burma.
I woke up.
Friday, March 23, 2007
In A Luang Phabang State Of Mind
I've been told many times that there are many more places in this world than Luang Phabang. It is thus unfortunate that most people are fools (possibly, me myself included).
In what ways is it possible for me to explain to them that this is the place where my heart really belongs, and when one's heart is possessed by a certain entity, one would never cease to draw himself closer to it. I am amazed at how despite being in a land so far away, I can still walk down the streets and not feel like I am in a foreign land at all.
How did this familarity brew when my total existence here at most consisted no more than a short parenthesis in this infinite macabre of a novel that is my life. Even I fail to understand, how then do I expect a fool to do the same.
Do I long to seek these answers or do I rather choose to stay here and romantisize the idea of this enigma.
If only the heightened sense of clarity that fills the air here would be of help.
In what ways is it possible for me to explain to them that this is the place where my heart really belongs, and when one's heart is possessed by a certain entity, one would never cease to draw himself closer to it. I am amazed at how despite being in a land so far away, I can still walk down the streets and not feel like I am in a foreign land at all.
How did this familarity brew when my total existence here at most consisted no more than a short parenthesis in this infinite macabre of a novel that is my life. Even I fail to understand, how then do I expect a fool to do the same.
Do I long to seek these answers or do I rather choose to stay here and romantisize the idea of this enigma.
If only the heightened sense of clarity that fills the air here would be of help.
Tuesday, March 13, 2007
Where Is My Flying Car
The 21st century has come and is scheduled to stay for another 92 years (if everything goes according to plan). Unfortunately the following items still do not exist...
- flying cars
- floating cities
- teleportation devices
- food capsules
- flying cars that fit into a briefcase
- robots that do all our work
- jetpacks
- effective totalitarian governments
- etcetra
I am utterly disappointed. I want to wake up to the theme song of 'The Jetsons' every morning.
- flying cars
- floating cities
- teleportation devices
- food capsules
- flying cars that fit into a briefcase
- robots that do all our work
- jetpacks
- effective totalitarian governments
- etcetra
I am utterly disappointed. I want to wake up to the theme song of 'The Jetsons' every morning.
Saturday, March 10, 2007
Ricochetted off Phnom Penh
2 days before my intended departure to the wonderful land of indo china, my dad admitted himself to the hospital because his liver was acting up on him again. Gasppppp! Horror! major decisions need to be made as the doctor also told us to 'be prepared for the worst', but a through diagnosis on his actual situation can only be made the following day as he will be receiving a blood transfusion and his condition needs to be stabilised before anything conclusive can be said. Therefore any decisions (on my part) should be made only when a proper diagnosis is done, this decision is made alot more difficult by the fact that I am supposed to be travelling with a friend, whom we shall call 'mimi' for now (well, in her blog i am referred to as 'gigi' which makes us 'gigi & mimi: adventure drama queens'.
Saturday came and the doctor's diagnosis was that my dad is on the road to recovery and would be discharged on monday. My mom felt that I should go ahead with my plans, and she insisted that i carry on no matter what. I on ther other hand decided that I would come back first thing when necessary.
So off I go on Sunday, off to the beautiful land of indochina with Mimi. We landed in Phnom Penh with a great sense of relief as both of us desperately needed this trip as we are going through a time of confusion and is in need to the heightened sense of clarity that I usually find in indo-china to think things through.
It was all rah rah rah and ha ha ha from then on as both me and Mimi (that sounds so super narcissistic... me me me) turned out to be wonderful travel partners and I am really comfortable with her. I believe we brought the best out of each other, though Mimi realized that she swears alot more with me around... fuck, how can that be.
until....
On monday nite at the internet place (a good thing is that we are both internet junkies, so an hour on the internet always follows our nights of food and gallavanting), I received an e-mail from my sister claiming that everything is not as it is perceived to be (especially to me). Apparently my dad took a turn for the worse on sunday morning and my mom mandated that my sisters hide that from me just so that I will still get on that plane to Phnom Penh. I was throughly pissed off, and to a certain extent, I felt betrayed. However my sister claims that the situation is just bad... not getting any worse, nor better...it just stayed 'bad' to a certain extent. Unfortunately having been deceived once left me with very little trust with the people back home. I was furious but unfortunately the situation calls for more panache and getting upset at my mom now is not really an option. Paranoia grew and I was going nuts... however I felt that Mimi does not need to know yet (though telling her the truth is inevitable as it is only fair for her to know my real situation)
Over lunch at a really decadent restaurant the following day, I popped the situation (sans getting down on my knees and ring) to her. However my decision then was to take things easy and see what happens. Life goes on. In lieu of my dad receiving 3 pints of blood the other day, I donated blood to the local children's hospital and Mimi, albeit her fear of the needle decided to do it too in solidarity of my dad's situation (Mimi, if you are reading this, I just want you to know that I was throughly touched by your gesture. I've restrained myself from expressing this gratitude in fear that i would go nuts)
On Wednesday, I received a phone call from my uncle (a reliable source of information) which explains the actual situation which is not pretty... kidneys and liver failing, minor brain damage and minor stroke. I went nuts. My first reaction was to pack my bags, go to the airport and buy a ticket for the next available flight to Kuala Lumpur. That was about 10 am when I found out. Fortunately I did not head to airport right away as I found out the flight was only at 430 in the afternoon. That leaves me with much time to say goodbye to Mimi, have lunch and help her draw up a solo plan on what she can potentially do next. We said our goodbyes in hope that a rondezvous would be possible later in Luang Phabang.
Arrived in the airport at about 2 pm and bought my tickets for the 430 flight. Major drama, I went berserk in the airport and the wait and flight home became one of the most emotionally torturous moment I have ever experienced. My mind was racing as tears roll uncontrollably; attempts to read my book was futile as I find myself unable to read beyond 3 sentences. All I could do was stare at the setting sun outside my window as my starboard side window seats faces the sun directly as I fly down south.
I arrived in Kuala Lumpur with my uncle waiting for me at the airport. He sent me to his house for a shower and some dinner, afterwhich we headed off straight to the hospital. During the long journey to his home from the airport, he gave me a through diagnosis of my dad and the family's condition. I reckoned I would be ready for what I am about to see (which I later realized I am not and eventually went nuts when i finally did see him).
After saying hi to my mom, sister, cousins, uncle, aunts, and whatnots I headed off to my dad's ward.
I held his hand and told him 'Father, I am back..'
PS: at the time this blog was posted, my dad has recovered and has gained consciouness from the stroke. Things are looking up for him and he is expected to be discharged in a day or two.
Saturday came and the doctor's diagnosis was that my dad is on the road to recovery and would be discharged on monday. My mom felt that I should go ahead with my plans, and she insisted that i carry on no matter what. I on ther other hand decided that I would come back first thing when necessary.
So off I go on Sunday, off to the beautiful land of indochina with Mimi. We landed in Phnom Penh with a great sense of relief as both of us desperately needed this trip as we are going through a time of confusion and is in need to the heightened sense of clarity that I usually find in indo-china to think things through.
It was all rah rah rah and ha ha ha from then on as both me and Mimi (that sounds so super narcissistic... me me me) turned out to be wonderful travel partners and I am really comfortable with her. I believe we brought the best out of each other, though Mimi realized that she swears alot more with me around... fuck, how can that be.
until....
On monday nite at the internet place (a good thing is that we are both internet junkies, so an hour on the internet always follows our nights of food and gallavanting), I received an e-mail from my sister claiming that everything is not as it is perceived to be (especially to me). Apparently my dad took a turn for the worse on sunday morning and my mom mandated that my sisters hide that from me just so that I will still get on that plane to Phnom Penh. I was throughly pissed off, and to a certain extent, I felt betrayed. However my sister claims that the situation is just bad... not getting any worse, nor better...it just stayed 'bad' to a certain extent. Unfortunately having been deceived once left me with very little trust with the people back home. I was furious but unfortunately the situation calls for more panache and getting upset at my mom now is not really an option. Paranoia grew and I was going nuts... however I felt that Mimi does not need to know yet (though telling her the truth is inevitable as it is only fair for her to know my real situation)
Over lunch at a really decadent restaurant the following day, I popped the situation (sans getting down on my knees and ring) to her. However my decision then was to take things easy and see what happens. Life goes on. In lieu of my dad receiving 3 pints of blood the other day, I donated blood to the local children's hospital and Mimi, albeit her fear of the needle decided to do it too in solidarity of my dad's situation (Mimi, if you are reading this, I just want you to know that I was throughly touched by your gesture. I've restrained myself from expressing this gratitude in fear that i would go nuts)
On Wednesday, I received a phone call from my uncle (a reliable source of information) which explains the actual situation which is not pretty... kidneys and liver failing, minor brain damage and minor stroke. I went nuts. My first reaction was to pack my bags, go to the airport and buy a ticket for the next available flight to Kuala Lumpur. That was about 10 am when I found out. Fortunately I did not head to airport right away as I found out the flight was only at 430 in the afternoon. That leaves me with much time to say goodbye to Mimi, have lunch and help her draw up a solo plan on what she can potentially do next. We said our goodbyes in hope that a rondezvous would be possible later in Luang Phabang.
Arrived in the airport at about 2 pm and bought my tickets for the 430 flight. Major drama, I went berserk in the airport and the wait and flight home became one of the most emotionally torturous moment I have ever experienced. My mind was racing as tears roll uncontrollably; attempts to read my book was futile as I find myself unable to read beyond 3 sentences. All I could do was stare at the setting sun outside my window as my starboard side window seats faces the sun directly as I fly down south.
I arrived in Kuala Lumpur with my uncle waiting for me at the airport. He sent me to his house for a shower and some dinner, afterwhich we headed off straight to the hospital. During the long journey to his home from the airport, he gave me a through diagnosis of my dad and the family's condition. I reckoned I would be ready for what I am about to see (which I later realized I am not and eventually went nuts when i finally did see him).
After saying hi to my mom, sister, cousins, uncle, aunts, and whatnots I headed off to my dad's ward.
I held his hand and told him 'Father, I am back..'
PS: at the time this blog was posted, my dad has recovered and has gained consciouness from the stroke. Things are looking up for him and he is expected to be discharged in a day or two.
Sunday, March 04, 2007
Reading Kafka
I landed in Phnom Penh... the flight was pretty rough but luckily managed to sleep through it. Reckon I was awfully tired from the past couple of days of rushing off work for everyone else. Sighh...
But until I can honestly articulate the thoughts in my head, I reckon I'll refrain from writing them here. Too much going on in my head right now. Madness. But I have 7 weeks to go... Hopefully that would make for some fantastic blogging material. Gasssppp.
What can I say... I am absolutely startled and overwhelmed. Watch out for this page... we'll see what happens.
But until I can honestly articulate the thoughts in my head, I reckon I'll refrain from writing them here. Too much going on in my head right now. Madness. But I have 7 weeks to go... Hopefully that would make for some fantastic blogging material. Gasssppp.
What can I say... I am absolutely startled and overwhelmed. Watch out for this page... we'll see what happens.
Wednesday, February 28, 2007
Hikayat Kambing Gurun Dan Walrus
Kambing gurun di Antartika
Lidah melekat di air batu
Walrus merayau di gurun Sahara
Mengaru-garu dibaham kutu
Penguin tergelak 'kakakakaka'
Gelagat kambing naik bulu
Unta tergelak 'hahahahaha'
Telatah walrus tersipu-sipu
Angin bertiup kencang belaka
Kambing gurun kesejukan kaku
Panas matahari tinggi nun sana
Walrus tercegat mampus terpaku
Lidah melekat di air batu
Walrus merayau di gurun Sahara
Mengaru-garu dibaham kutu
Penguin tergelak 'kakakakaka'
Gelagat kambing naik bulu
Unta tergelak 'hahahahaha'
Telatah walrus tersipu-sipu
Angin bertiup kencang belaka
Kambing gurun kesejukan kaku
Panas matahari tinggi nun sana
Walrus tercegat mampus terpaku
Thursday, February 22, 2007
Pantun Tiga Rangkap Untukmu
Kedatangan kamu membawa padah
Lirikan mata menusuk jiwa
Minda dan raga terasa bagai nak muntah.
Lirikan mata menusuk jiwa
Minda dan raga terasa bagai nak muntah.
Cheerios
Over the past couple of days I've been trying to write something in here. Unfortunately, every attempt proves futile as i fail to honestly articulate the nonsensical thoughts in my head. Therefore if I do not write anything in the next couple of days, please forgive me. Well, does it matter? Nobody reads this anyway. Cheerios.
PS: I wouldn't go down so low... not to your level I'm sorry.
PS: I wouldn't go down so low... not to your level I'm sorry.
Friday, February 16, 2007
See That Rainbow Walk By...
Today I became a rainbow... my ensamble of clothing comprised of the following colours in its most striking hues.
- orange slippers.
- purple pants.
- blue t-shirt.
- red fan.
- green 'go green' bag.
All I need now is a yellow hat. Maybe I should get one of those yellow hard hats from construction sites.
Waitaminute, that's not a good idea. Being a rainbow with a construction hard hat looking like a member of the village people... Hmmm...
That would definitely attract the wrong kind of attention.
- orange slippers.
- purple pants.
- blue t-shirt.
- red fan.
- green 'go green' bag.
All I need now is a yellow hat. Maybe I should get one of those yellow hard hats from construction sites.
Waitaminute, that's not a good idea. Being a rainbow with a construction hard hat looking like a member of the village people... Hmmm...
That would definitely attract the wrong kind of attention.
Thursday, February 15, 2007
Runnnnnnn......
Let's live in an island.
I can grow vegetables. You can fish fishes.
I'll grow organic squashes, greens, and beans.
You'll fish groupers, jacks, and yellowfins.
My papayas are non-GMO, your tuna is dolphin safe
As my garden grows, we'll shelter in a cave
And if outsiders try to intrude
We'll harpoon their asses to Beirut.
Wednesday, February 14, 2007
Free Hugs
I want to take it to the streets today and give random people free hugs and flowers. But since flowers are gonna be really expensive today, I think I'll just give out hugs.... And since I am required to sit my fat ass in the edit suite all day long today, I reckon I won't be doing anything at all.
So to everyone who is reading this post, please claim your free hugs and flowers by typing 'Yes, I want a hug!' in the comments section. Offer valid until 18 February 2007. Terms & Conditions apply.
Sunday, February 11, 2007
The Guided Misadventures of Rocko the Secret Squirrel and Carlos, The Latin American Giant Hare. (Part One)
There exists a problem, a very big problem, a problem so big that if not solved instantly, might develop into a full blown international diplomatic crisis. This problem must be immediately brought forward to the attention of the international board of secret squirrels.
On the big screen TV of the secret squirrels headquarters conference hall projects the most horrorful (it was so horrific that the secret squirrels decided that no word in the existing set of vocabulary fits the situation. Therefore the ministry of vocabulary decided that a new word must be concocted to reflect the true situation. However, the cabinet did not agree unanimously on this. Some felt that 'horrorfuliffic', or 'horrendousful', or even 'horrorlicious' would be much more appropriate. But of course whenever such suggestions were thrown by one party, the others would go 'oh that is so absolutely horrorfullic!' or, 'oh my, how can we endorse such a horrorful word!'. Eventually since 'horrorful' received a majority of votes (albeit a very thin majority), it was thus decided that 'horrorful' should be that new word. Of course this does not go well for the others. Allegations of vote fixing, phantom wording, alphabet tampering and money politics were hurled. A call for a recount resounded; but due to the urgency of the situation, the minister decided that they should stick on 'horrorful'. "We will repel the word 'horrorful' from our vocabulary once this crisis is over, but for now, in the interest of national security we must, temporarily insert 'horrorful' into our vocabulary...", said the minister. Of course, one can imagine the fury of those who opposed the word... insults were hurled and the other party quickly formed an alliance and walked out of the hall in protest. Later, when interviewed by the press, a representative of the opposition said "We stand united... in principle, to unanimously oppose against the formation of such a horrorful word") image ever seen in the history of squirrelkind. A giant screw is lodged in the bellies of the earth. The earth is literally being screwed.
Surveyors were dispatched instantly to the site. So big was the screw that it took them 2 hours to measure the entire length with their 'zebra brand' wooden ruler. In total, it measured 278 feet (let it be known that the reason it took so long to measure this screw was because the ruler that they used was merely 30 centimeters long. It would have taken much longer if they had sticked to using the 15 centimeter one, fortunately a kind anonymous squirrel bought the 30 cm ruler out of his own pocket and donated it to the cash strapped surveyors.), give and take a couple of inches.
The secret squirrels fall into a stupor. As they chew on their winter reserve of pine nuts, they find themselves asking 'who in the right mind would go into the trouble of driving such a big screw into the bellies of the earth?', even more puzzling was 'who on earth would possess such a massive screwdriver, capable of driving such a humungous screw?'. They scratch their heads.
Scratch...
Scratch...
Chew...
Chew...
Scratch...
(to be continued...)
On the big screen TV of the secret squirrels headquarters conference hall projects the most horrorful (it was so horrific that the secret squirrels decided that no word in the existing set of vocabulary fits the situation. Therefore the ministry of vocabulary decided that a new word must be concocted to reflect the true situation. However, the cabinet did not agree unanimously on this. Some felt that 'horrorfuliffic', or 'horrendousful', or even 'horrorlicious' would be much more appropriate. But of course whenever such suggestions were thrown by one party, the others would go 'oh that is so absolutely horrorfullic!' or, 'oh my, how can we endorse such a horrorful word!'. Eventually since 'horrorful' received a majority of votes (albeit a very thin majority), it was thus decided that 'horrorful' should be that new word. Of course this does not go well for the others. Allegations of vote fixing, phantom wording, alphabet tampering and money politics were hurled. A call for a recount resounded; but due to the urgency of the situation, the minister decided that they should stick on 'horrorful'. "We will repel the word 'horrorful' from our vocabulary once this crisis is over, but for now, in the interest of national security we must, temporarily insert 'horrorful' into our vocabulary...", said the minister. Of course, one can imagine the fury of those who opposed the word... insults were hurled and the other party quickly formed an alliance and walked out of the hall in protest. Later, when interviewed by the press, a representative of the opposition said "We stand united... in principle, to unanimously oppose against the formation of such a horrorful word") image ever seen in the history of squirrelkind. A giant screw is lodged in the bellies of the earth. The earth is literally being screwed.
Surveyors were dispatched instantly to the site. So big was the screw that it took them 2 hours to measure the entire length with their 'zebra brand' wooden ruler. In total, it measured 278 feet (let it be known that the reason it took so long to measure this screw was because the ruler that they used was merely 30 centimeters long. It would have taken much longer if they had sticked to using the 15 centimeter one, fortunately a kind anonymous squirrel bought the 30 cm ruler out of his own pocket and donated it to the cash strapped surveyors.), give and take a couple of inches.
The secret squirrels fall into a stupor. As they chew on their winter reserve of pine nuts, they find themselves asking 'who in the right mind would go into the trouble of driving such a big screw into the bellies of the earth?', even more puzzling was 'who on earth would possess such a massive screwdriver, capable of driving such a humungous screw?'. They scratch their heads.
Scratch...
Scratch...
Chew...
Chew...
Scratch...
(to be continued...)
Friday, February 09, 2007
Memori Di Mimaland 1986
I long for Mimaland.
For its water slides and swimming pools,
For its skating rinks and funny mirror rooms,
For its mini golf and groovy playgrounds
And most of all, who can forget...
The dinosaurs that once roamed the earth.
The biggest swimming pool in South East Asia
The highest water slides in South East Asia
Oh hello mother...
Shammah, Cheng Ee, Yuen Teng, Chee Hung.
Yuen Teng.
Everyone... Uncle Wai Keen, Cheng Ee, Shammah, Mother, Chee Hung, Yuen Teng.
photos by Yuen Fun.
Let's go to Mimaland.
Tuesday, February 06, 2007
Sigh...
It's going to be a very long day...
Maybe you'll like to come with me, we'll go running and cut this day in half.
Maybe you'll like to come with me, we'll go running and cut this day in half.
Sunday, February 04, 2007
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